Disturbia

It all started on the second day of October 2009, when I decided to watch a movie after travelling 80 km from Mundra to Gandhidham. All I wanted to do was to enjoy the movie, so, me being the punctual type of guy, started early remembering that "early bird catches the flight". On reaching the multiplex, I was glad I had 3 choices,
1. I could watch 'Wake up Sid' starring Ranbir "Romeo" Kapoor and thats all I know of the movie.
2. I could watch 'Wanted' starring Sallu mea with long macho hair and stuff. Since, I knew before that this was a spoof of the telugu hit "Pokiri", and I did not want to see Ayesha Takia's takias bouncing up and down (you know what I mean). So, automatically, this was a bad choice.
3. I decided to watch 'Do knot Disturb' which after glancing at the poster revealed a good mix of actors like comedian Govinda & Former miss universe Sushmita. Immediately, bought the ticket and fell inside the theater

Little did I realize, the star cast was completely different, this is wat it looked like
a. An obese Govinda obsessed with Shahrukh's bolti in the movie "Darr"
b. An obese and busty Sushmita
c. A skinny Ritesh Deshmukh
d. A medium sized medium busted Lara dutta
e. A horny Rajpal yadav
f. Out of nowhere, Ranbir Shorey who loves showing his undies.
Overall, directed by "comedy ka sartaj", the huge, the mega obese David Dhawan, check it out.



Well, to be honest, the movie started off on a good enough note, with good dialogues but the story is itself so 'ghisa pita' (about extra-marital affairs & nothing else). David ji should have transferred some of his weight to the film, kuch to wajan hoti film mein. But he chose to transfer his weight to Govinda & Sush baby (no longer a baby, she is now Grandma! ). So, one can expect to carry the burden of all these weights superimposed while watching the movie.

Coming to the dialogues, one top class dialogue which I can remember out of the many cheap mobile spoofs are " Woh dono toh aise lipte hue hain jaise ek hi mobile mein do do sim ghusaya hai" and many such spoofs like : outgoing shuru karo, sms bhejo and so on and so forth.

Now the part which every Bollywood movie is not complete without!, the song dude!!
Well, there was this song, Youre my bebo which really stinks of raw flesh from foreign prostitutes dancing in the background and Ritesh doing "Yo man, wassup" stuff. No complaints about Lara, except she is not Bebo, Kareena is Bebo man. Wat the hell!



Speaking of Kareena, wonder how she would have looked like if she would have acted in 'Dil bole Hadippa' starring skinny Rani Mukherjee
Here's an attempt to find out how she would have looked like, a BEBO Sardar




Well, needless to say, Hadippa would have been Hudi baba with a punjabi accent if we had Bebo in it, also, it needed to star Saif ali compulsorily.

Whatever!!

Only wonder when will another sensible film release, how much longer would the patient common man have to wait. Lets wait and see.

You are nasty

How would you react to the following situation:-
one gloomy morning, you open up your mailbox and recieve a mail from an unknown stranger, you do not know the guy and you reply saying that you are not the intended recipient. You feel your work is done and suddenly you get this freaky reply

"You are nasty"

But, here is the twist - you come to know from another source that the reply is from an 8 year old kid. Now what would be your reaction?

Although, the kid's reply itself was nasty, he must be appreciated for his knowledge of words, mailing knowledge and other general knowledge. The kid seemed to know how to reply to mails with a vengeance. One must really appreciate his attitude, here's a glimpse of it



Moral of the story: Never take panga with the new generation kids, especially spoilt brats with loads of cash in banks left over by generous dad's.

Old Mc Donald had a spam!

Arz kiya hai
Old Mc Donald had a spam ,eeya eeya oh
And in that spam he won a fortune, eeya eeya oh
From Discount printer ink to Free sex pills
From Madhumati Singh to Deborah Whitney
What else could he ask for, eeya eeya oh

Taaliyaan, Taaliyan

Well, this post is dedicated to all those mails which lie in the dark corner of your mailbox, also known as the 'spam'

Different spam filters work differently, i.e, in google and yahoo, the mails go in the spam folder and remain there for 30 days or unless one deletes them. Indiatimes had the worst mailbox (sometimes I wonder it had a mailbox with a hole!) which showers mails into the inbox, leaving the user to decide 'spam or not spam' which gave me a good reason to stick with only yahoo and google.

The point is that sometimes these mails feel so real that one might be taken for a ride if any button linked to it is clicked even once. Sometimes, people who trust these distress mails get duped of their online savings in their banks. Recently, a group from London operated in this way promising lucarative jobs in exchange for a service fee.

Other kind of spam mails recieved only during the festival season are also irritating, you know that the author doesn't care for you and doesn't really mean anything by the greeting, its just an eyewash, a business strategy, nothing else!
But, even after knowing this, we treasure mails in the hope that may be there is a 0.01% chance if the author really meant it. Here's one of them

Dear MR. JEETENDRA

As 2008 dawns to a close and 2009 beckons, I want to personally thank you for your continued patronage of Kingfisher Airlines.

It was an exciting year for Kingfisher Airlines. We launched our international operations and introduced Kingfisher Red, a new class of service that will redefine low fare flying. As we enter 2009, we will continue to raise the bar on India’s only Five Star flying experience with innovative service offerings, and will be adding new international routes starting with direct flights from Mumbai to London, Singapore, Hong Kong.

I am glad to inform you that Kingfisher Airlines now connects 70 destinations with 440 daily flights. I regularly receive feedback from valuable guests like you and want to thank you for your kind wishes, great ideas and suggestions on how we can offer you an even better journey with Kingfisher Airlines.

Here’s raising a toast to this festive season and wishing you a very Happy New Year.


Warm Regards,

Dr. Vijay Mallya
Chairman & CEO
Kingfisher Airlines Limited